Malibu Ain't Big Enough for the Both of 'Em
by electricblondiie
Summary: Miley's cousins come for a visit in Malibu, but some unexpected changes have happened to that hillbilly loser of a girl that she used to hang around with in Tennessee. Can Malibu handle not one, but two Stewart families? Can anyone?


**Author's Note:** Hey, everyone! I had an online friend a few months back and we sort of co-wrote this fanfic together. I myself have never written one, and this was mainly her doing. I was going through my documents because I have like noo memory left on my laptop, and found this. I haven't managed to get back in contact with her recently, but I felt that our (mainly, her) story deserved to be published. She wrote them, but was too afraid of criticism to publish. So, here it is. We don't own Hannah Montana. We didn't come up with the ideas, we've never read any scripts, attended open casting calls, and I, personally, have never been to Disney. Enjoy the story, and feel free to review as honestly as possible. xo, electricblondiie

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Miley, Lilly, and Oliver were crashed on a particularly comfy sofa in Miley's living room. The TV was blaring a commercial for some heinous hair-replacement product, so, naturally, Oliver was laughing hysterically. Lilly was torn between laughing with him and at him, and looked to Miley for an answer. However, the girl appeared quite pensive, which puzzled Lilly. Sure, Miley could be thoughtful-but actually lost deep in thought? Befuddled seemed to be the right word for it, and she prodded her back into the world.

"Miley?" Lilly questioned.

"What?! Pancakes? Not again..ohh." Miley replied, shaking her head back into consciousness. "Oliver!" she groaned, reaching over to smack him gently on the head, "Do you really _have _to do that every time we see that ad?"

Oliver was still on the floor, catching his breath and doing his best to restrain a grin. "Of course!" he said, enthusiastically, and promptly dissolved into girlish giggles again. Lilly, however, was still confused. "What were ya thinkin' about?"

"Oh, just trying to remember something important that I knew was going to happen today and I definitely should know it…no big." Miley joked, grinning. "But really..what was it? A concert? Nahh…photo shoot? Project? Argh! I can't remember!"

"There's a school dance coming up on Friday." Oliver commented from the floor, his face stuffed full of Oreos. "Maybe that was it?"

Lilly groaned. "_Another _dance?! That's like our third in the last two months…or second in the last…or wait….ugh, I confused myself. Give me an Oreo." She snatched the package from Oliver and started cramming some into her own mouth.

"Lilly, I thought you liked the dances…" Miley trailed off, wondering if something was wrong.

"Yeah, well, I do, but the thing is….." Lilly started ranting away and Miley was lost in thought again. It was important, maybe a person, people? Visitors? Grandparents…another performance for the Queen? That seemed unlikely….was that the doorbell? Yup, that was definitely the doorbell….

"MILEY!" shrieked Oliver and Lilly together, "THE DOORBELL IS RINGING!"

Immediately jolted out of her reverie, and figuring there was no way Jackson would ever get the door, Miley stood up, adjusted her skirt, and walked towards the door. Listening intently to the noise outside (what if it were a kidnapper!) she shushed her two friends (now bickering over the Oreos) and tried to hear what was happening outside.

A stagewhispered voice with a serious southern twang chided "Ella May Stewart! Y'all'd better hush up before you wake the whole dirn neighborhood!"

This time, a little girl's voice, with an equally as southern accent "But, Mama, that don't make any sense! It's only four-o-clock here!"

"Well, honey, Mama's still on Tennessee time, and it would be six-o-clock there."

Confused, the little girl replied "But the whole dirn neighborhood wouldn't be asleep at six-"

A third voice, male, boomed "Both of y'all had better quiet down! We're here to see my brother, li'l Robby Ray, and his kids, not argue at their front door!"

Realization slowly dimmed on Miley's face. Of course! Uncle Carl Jim and his family was visiting! She quickly racked her brain for their names. There was Uncle Carl Jim, one of daddy's older brothers, and his wife. Amy? Marla? Marlie? Jayna? Something not too common…and two daughters. Ugh, oh no, those two daughters! There was a little one, almost adorable (until she threw a temper tantrum) and that other one, her own age. Back in Tennessee, the two of them had been pretty close, but upon moving to Malibu, Miley quickly realized how much of a hillbilly loser her cousins were. And they were there for the rest of the week..and she was expected to entertain them…oh, sweet apple pie, there was a dance on Friday! Despite the fact that she wanted to postpone this little shenanigan as long as possible, the family had waited long enough. Miley winced, whispered "Brace yourselves!" to her friends, and flung open the door. Her friends took refuge behind the couch, trusting Miley that whatever it was, it would not be good.

"Uncle Carl Jim! Aunt Melissie!" Miley cried (whoo, close save with the name) "Come on in! Hi Ellie! How're y'all doin'?!"

Fast-forwarding, there was quite a lot of shrieking, perfume, thick accents, and bags. Introductions, etc. etc. And then the best part.

"Carl bunny?" Aunt Melissie questioned.

Her husband turned red, but responded upon seeing his wife's stern look. "Yes, darlin'? What is it?"

"Sweetie pie, last I checked, we had ourselves two baby girls. We're missin' a daughter!"

"Baby, that's ridiculous, we have Ellie May right over thurr! And…aw, tarnation…where's.."

But everyone was distracted from the missing daughter when there was a huge commotion from the door. Ellie May, age six, had already managed to pop open a few suitcases, spill things out, trip over them, and clunk her head on the doorframe. While she bawled hysterically, Lilly and Oliver managed to sneak out of the back door-that was not a scene they wanted to get too involved in, much to Miley's dismay. However, as they walked down the driveway, they began to laugh so hard that tears were practically rolling out of their eyes. In a last-ditch effort to keep her balance, Lilly dropped her skateboard, which Oliver promptly tripped over. Thankfully, something broke his balance!

Or, some_one_, really.

"Ah!" shrieked Oliver.

"Ex-cuse me?!" shrieked a girl.

"AH!" shrieked Oliver.

"What in tarnation!" shrieked the girl, in a lilting southern accent. Oliver scrambled up, mumbling apologies and turning a nice shade of magenta, while Lilly couldn't stop herself from rolling on the ground, on the verge of hysterics. Cracking an eye open, she saw jeans tucked into cowboy boots, a white ribbed tank, and a tied up flannel shirt. Two blonde braids hung down from a typical cowboy hat, when, suddenly, the girl spoke again.

"Howdy." She said, tentatively, "I'm Sadie Skylar Stewart, but y'all can just call me Sadie. Can either of you tell me where to find the Stewart residence?"

Lilly jumped up quickly and brushed herself off. Oliver's mouth had fallen open, and no one had bothered to close it. "Y'all'd better shut your mouth before flies get in it." Sadie said to him, jokingly.

There was no _way _that _this_ was the hillbilly, loserish cousin they'd heard endless complaints about. "You're staring." Lilly said rudely to Oliver.

But "D…engh…uhh…" was all he could manage.


End file.
